Thursday, March 10, 2005

The Bathroom

As I sat in the bathroom today trying to work through some writers block and dealing with some other blockage of my own, I finally got some clarity as to what I should write about next. Why not just write about some thoughts and questions I have about bathrooms?

This may be disgusting to some of you, and if it is I apoligize. The only thing I can say to you, is sorry and that you should probably quit being so anal. Here are a couple of my thoughts about bathrooms.

1. Why do they usually position the toilet in the direction of the mirror? Who wants to look at themselves while they are taking a dookie? I mean, are there people out there that are vain enough to think, "Damn, I look good on this thing while I crap". Do people really sit there and fix their hair while they are sitting?

To me this is a very concept, and I am glad that my place does not have the toilets facing the mirrors.

2. Toilet paper must always be place on the roll so it rolls over the top towards you. Anything else is wrong and is flat out annoying. I am still trying to work with my wife on this topic. She is a under roller, and it really bugs me. If she is the one that exchanges the toilet paper I am constantly having to swith it so it rolls over the top. I am hoping with time, she will get there. So for all you "under" rollers--stop doing it. It is wrong. Be an "over" roller.

3. How much time is an "okay" time to spend in the bathroom? 2 minutes? 10? I need to know.

Holla back.

3 comments:

Chris said...

There is no excuse for the paper rolling under the roll. Who wants the paper laying on the wall? You need to have this corrected.

I don't really like to linger in the bathroom. I like to take care of business and get out. One thing that has improved my bathroom experience is wireless internet. I now don't have to leave a good internet poker game to heed the call of nature.

fever said...

I guess the toilet paper thing ain't a hill for me to die on....that being said, I am anal anough about some things to understand why it could be an issue.
I have to say, I can't understand spending much time in the bathroom. It isn't the most comfortable seat in the house. The dookie is a quick experience for me--get in, get out. I'd rather be sitting on the couch or a more comfortable chair where I don't have to stare at the wall and play with the toilet paper or something else....

Carrie said...

You know, I have to agree with you that the "under roll" is wrong. And here is why.... only known by some of us women. If there is some type of colored print on the toilet paper(which I will age myself now because they used to sell it like that-haven't seen it that way in awhile)if you under roll the toilet paper you cannot see the print. And that's all i have to say about that!